70-Year-Old Widow Posts A Newspaper Ad To Find A Husband

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again… She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you – you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?

Related Posts

Drunk Guy Gets Pulled Over

Late one quiet night, a drunk guy gets pulled over after swerving just enough to catch a patrol car’s attention on an otherwise empty road. The officer…

Dog found in dumpster wrapped up in duct tape: “I have never seen anything like it”

It’s truly horrifying how cruel some people can be towards animals. Recently, one poor dog was found with his entire head wrapped in duct tape. Though it…

SAD NEW: King Charles…

In a revelation that has stunned the world, sources close to the British royal family have reported that King Charles III recently made a deeply personal confession…

Meaning behind Erika Kirk’s heartbreaking gesture

The widow of Charlie Kirk made an emotional gesture during her late husband’s memorial service yesterday (September 21). Earlier this month, the late political activist and Turning…

National MourningSchool bus accident: 32 children lost… See more

REPUBLISHED: “We Still Remember” — 8 Years Since the Karatu School Bus Tragedy That Claimed 32 Young Lives Originally published: May 2017 Republished: June 2025 It has…

What Does the Air Recirculation Button in Your Car Actually Do? (And When to Use It!)

The air recirculation button in your car is one of the most commonly used—but least understood—features on the dashboard. Identified by an icon of a car with…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *